Not So Easily Bruised


Photo courtesy Stu Seeger

There are so many times in my life where I have worried about something I have said or done that involves a family member or a friend. Maybe I’ve said something and I’m not sure how they took it. Maybe there was something I did and I’m not sure if it upset them. I worry about whether they’re upset with me or if I’ve hurt our relationship.

If they are truly my friend, should I be concerned that I’ve doneĀ irreparableĀ damage? I mean obviously if it was something very serious that might be the case, but I’m just talking about day to day missteps like I haven’t called them in a while or I forgot to say “hi” last week at church.

So much of my life has been wasted on purposeless worry. If you are truly my friend, then I would expect that it’s going to take something pretty big to damage the relationship. And the reverse is true too. I’m not going to hold it against you for the little missteps.

I just hate it when I’m not sure if someone is upset with me. Real friends should be friend enough to come up and smack me upside the head and tell me not to do that again. Going off and sulking in a corner is just too ambiguous.

And if you are upset over something small and petty, should I really be concerned about the loss of your friendship if there really was one to start with? Perhaps I’d do better to focus on the friendships where I don’t have to walk on eggshells to maintain the relationship.

Let’s agree together that I won’t be mad at you, and you won’t be made at me so that we can both sleep better tonight and know that we’re forgiven. That’s the kind of friendships I’m looking for. The others are just too easily bruised and I just can’t continue to expend the effort it takes to maintain one of those relationships.